QUESTION: Hello! Since I'm a senior in school, I know that I'm dealing more with "boys" then "men", but one of my guy friends is confusing me. We're relatively close and constantly flirt, so I asked him for help by going on a double date with me, my friend, and someone she was interested in. He agreed, but only if we talked about something afterwards. He keeps saying that "it's not a big deal", but then why is he so secretive about what he wants to talk about? He won't even tell his best friend, and his friend is mad that he doesn't know either. All I want to know is what he considers to be "not a big deal", especially since he's so tight-lipped about it.
Thanks!
CHUCK: How do I answer this? This could be anything. He may want to ask about dating you. But he may want to borrow some money. Hell, he may want one of your kidneys. Based on the info here, I can't really speculate.
I do agree that this guy seems to fall on the "boys" side of the equation , what with the whole "I've got a secret" thing. But it also seems like you're interested, and maybe are hoping for some kind of request to move your relationship forward.
Calm down, and wait and see what he wants to talk about. Keep an open mind, but if what he's suggesting is not what you're looking for right now, don't flip out. Keep your poker face. Who knows what could happen later. However, there is one thing you absolutely should not do: Don't lend him any money. Resist the urge. But if you do, please drop us a line, and let us know when your episode of Judge Mathis is playing.
GARLAND: Yeah, I'm with Chuck. This big secret could be anything:
"My left foot is so much bigger than my right foot..."
"My middle name is Leslie..."
"I'm the Captain of my neighborhood Double-Dutch team..."
Considering that high school guys are in fact, high school boys that typically think they're men - it could be absolutely anything. Let it play out and act cool about whatever he says. I'm 90% sure that it will not be earth shattering or anything that will change your life.
One point from Chuck's answer that I can't agree with is the Judge Mathis thing - EVERYBODY knows that Judge Joe Brown favors the ladies! Go to his courtroom.
3 comments:
I agree, wait and see what he wants. I also think it is very wise on your part that you see your friend as more of a boy than a man. I think as you grow up you'll find that many older guys remain immature for decades. I'm not sure why this is, but it's been my experience.
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